Not Me! Monday

OK.. its that time again. My trusty assistant and I will be sharing all the things that we DON'T do. (And by assisting I mean that he hangs out in the computer loft with me watching cartoons over the railing.)

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I promise that I do NOT ever use Pediasure as a coffee creamer.

I did NOT find myself leaving the hospital today lugging a fully stuffed backpack of gear, an 18 pound child in a sling, an oxygen tank with a shoulder strap and a full cup of coffee. All because I was too stubborn to bring the stroller in, wanting to be one of those "cool crunchy" mamas but being hopelessly stuck in a world of medical appliances and formula and such.

I did not carry a child and oxygen all the way to the neighborhood mail kiosk to mail my rent check which had to go out today only to see the mail truck still there and realize I forgot my envelope. I did not then have to run back to the condo to grab it and come back to find the mailman had already left and then try to at least pick up our mail, but get confused as to which key to use and which box is ours and go back home empty handed (well besides the letter I didn't get to send and also besides a heavy oxygen tank and a heavy kid in each arm.)

Driving this morning, when the 8:00 am medication alarm went off on my phone, I did NOT seriously consider reaching back to the car seat to steal a binky and give a cyclosporin dose while driving 60 mph on the highway. If I had actually considered doing that, hopefully I'd get a moment of common sense and decide to pull over to give the med on time instead.

I did not score an 80% then an 83% when aloud to retake my first online exam (which was open book and basically open - anything since I had the internet open and available to every resource out there) That would be a bad start to my wanna-be-nursing career if I can't manage an A in any of my pre-req's.

Not Me! Monday.

OK.. here is my first try at this. These are all the things that I did NOT/ do NOT do.

1. I did not give two other moms dirty looks at the hospital this morning for arriving at the lab 15 seconds before us, thereby securing a significant place ahead of us in line for Transplant Clinic today and getting to be outta there sooner on such a busy day.

2.I do not find myself out and about, starting to make a phone call and feeling a wet, slimy goo against my ear because my son likes to use the phone as a chew toy.

3. I do not bribe said child to eat something.. anything by mouth by giving him smashed oreos and ice cream in lieu of fruit/ veggie purees.

4. I do not play this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIYaxG_YZDg in one window over and over while screwing around online on the other.

5. I do not force my 1 year old to stand in as a pretend patient to practice all of my CNA skills on.
6. I did not spend the entire weekend using disposable just because I was too lazy to move the cloth diapes from the washer to the dryer.

Click on the link to the left to check out the original Not Me! at My Charming Kids.